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JAMIE JOHNESEE

(Submitted 19th July 2006)

Since I was seven years old I can remember wanting to be a zookeeper. When I was 14 I began on my zookeeping career path and had been a zookeeper for 14 years when last July this horrific pain began in my right arm. I had finally gotten the job of my dreams. After being extremely overworked at a zoo down south, I recieved an offer to come back home to Michigan and work at one of the best zoo's in the country (the best in my opinion). My bosses and coworkers were amazing, they valued me as an employee and peer. I was recieving the verbal pats on the back everyone longs to hear at work, and my ideas to better my department were actually being taken seriously and put into action. I was given a very early promotion and was the happiest I ever remember being. I had also met my now husband back on March of 2005. My life was going so great. I was used to feeling constant pain, I figured it was normal given my career. I was also used to being exhausted all the time, again attributing it to my choice of occupation. I had no clue that it wasn't normal to only have a bowel movement once every two weeks ( I have had what I now know as IBS since I can remember). Like most FM stories I have heard I went to different doctors for different symptoms. Finally I found a doctor who ran every single test known to man, right down to a DNA work up to see if I might have a genetic disorder. I was lucky enough to have found a doctor who was not only through (she immediately wanted to rule out Lyme disease, given my career) but she is also treating other FM patients as well. Taking a very through history and giving me what I like to call the push test, she diagnosed me last July. I probably should have taken her advice then and tried to cut back work hours, but we were union and that was impossible. In late August, early September the exhaustion won and my body basically shut down. My husband (now) had to carry me to the bathroom, and bathe me and even brush my teeth and hair for me. I took FLMA (The family medical leave act) and for the three months I was off had almost no improvement. I was devastated when my doctor told me I probably would not be able to be a zookeeper any time soon. I believe she used the term possibly even years, if ever. So there I was unemployed, depressed and feeling so useless and helpless. I had always been so independent, you have to be being a zookeeper, you have to go where the jobs are. (I have lived in Mobile, Alabama; Indianapolis, Indiana; Birmingham, Alabama and Michigan.) It has been hardest on me emotionally and mentally because I lost my identity when I lost my career. I still don't know exactly what to do with my life (I have been writing children's books about animals) and I still feel depressed but with all the information out there and my doctor's and husband's help I now feel like I might be okay. The pain isn't as bad as it once was and now I have at least 3 days a week where I can move, type and feel mostly normal. So I guess I am on the road to homeostasis (zookeeping term for leveling out and returning to normal). I want to thank everyone who does share their stories and the folks who give them a place to do so, because without all of that I would never have been able to recover mentally. So thank you all so very much and I wish that one day this disease will be banished. Until that day, be well and be strong.
Mrs. Jaime Johnesee

zookeeper829@aol.com